What a great list! I almost fell out of my chair laughing at the triathlon quotation. I've never seen the Marx quotation on a t-shirt, but I've loved it for years.
My pleasure. I actually have more, but a lot of them are of a different vein.
The "fruit flies like a banana" gets me every time because of the dual nature of the second part...that it can be both that a species of flies like bananas or that fruit is capable of flight.
I'll leave you with a few more:
"The metric system is the tool of the devil! My car gets forty rods to the hogshead, and that's the way I likes it." -Abe Simpson, "A Star is Burns"
"Bones heal. Chicks dig scars. Glory lives forever!" - Ultimate Frisbee Quote (with apologies to Captain Lance Murdoch, The Simpsons)
'My 3-year-old son likes to play "Sleeping Beauty." Only instead of "Sleeping Beauty" it's "Sleeping Daddy," and instead of "...awakened by a kiss," it's "...awakened by a flying knee-drop to the groin."' - Kevin Fox (http://www.ruminate.com/arcs/arcs03.htm )
"Trimming quoted text in email leaves more room for you in heaven." -Ricardo Signes in irc://irc.perl.org/#perl
"Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand." - Homer Simpson
"Our Lady of Blessed Acceleration, don't fail me now!" - Elwood Blues
"I'm upping my standards, so up yours!"
ReplyDelete-Pat Paulsen (1927-1997), Presidential Campaign Slogan
"Outside of a dog, a book is probably man's best friend; inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."
-Groucho Marx
"Everybody generalizes from one example. At least, I do."
-Steven Brust
Bumper Sticker: Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
"I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame you."
- Unknown
"Save time... see it my way."
- Unknown
"Why are you here, and what can I do to change that?"
- Unknown
"If things get any worse, I'll have to ask you to stop helping me."
- Unknown
"I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you."
- Unknown
"I have made this letter longer than usual, only because I have not had the time to make it shorter."
- Blaise Pascal
"If god invented marathons to keep people from doing anything more stupid, the triathlon must have taken him completely by surprise."
- P.Z. Pearce
"Start by doing what's necessary; then do what's possible; and suddenly you are doing the impossible."
- St. Francis of Assisi
Love the haiku! lol!
ReplyDeleteJot,
ReplyDeleteWhat a great list! I almost fell out of my chair laughing at the triathlon quotation. I've never seen the Marx quotation on a t-shirt, but I've loved it for years.
Thanks for taking time to share!
Susan
My pleasure. I actually have more, but a lot of them are of a different vein.
ReplyDeleteThe "fruit flies like a banana" gets me every time because of the dual nature of the second part...that it can be both that a species of flies like bananas or that fruit is capable of flight.
I'll leave you with a few more:
"The metric system is the tool of the devil! My car gets forty rods to the hogshead, and that's the way I likes it."
-Abe Simpson, "A Star is Burns"
"Bones heal. Chicks dig scars. Glory lives forever!"
- Ultimate Frisbee Quote
(with apologies to Captain Lance Murdoch, The Simpsons)
'My 3-year-old son likes to play "Sleeping Beauty." Only instead of "Sleeping Beauty" it's "Sleeping Daddy," and instead of "...awakened by a kiss," it's "...awakened by a flying knee-drop to the groin."'
- Kevin Fox (http://www.ruminate.com/arcs/arcs03.htm )
"Trimming quoted text in email leaves more room for you in heaven."
-Ricardo Signes in irc://irc.perl.org/#perl
"Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand."
- Homer Simpson
"Our Lady of Blessed Acceleration, don't fail me now!"
- Elwood Blues
Oh, and for the Marx quote: Here in Arizona there is a used book store that sells shirts with it:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.bookmans.com/
http://shopbookmans.com/cart.php?target=product&product_id=16155&category_id=249
-Jot