Last night, I did some Christmas decorating. Not much, just a little. The family is campaigning for a real tree, while I'm pretty certain that cleaning up an endless supply of evergreen needles would turn me into a grumpy old man named Ebenezer who walks around muttering bah, humbug all day.
We love the experience of going to the tree farm, riding a tractor trailer with bales of hay for seats, selecting and chopping down a tree, and hauling it to the nice people who shake and wrap it for transport. While they do that dirty work, we go visit THE BEST SANTA IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD, get hot cocoa or cider, pay for our tree, watch a model train go round and round, and visit a few of Santa's reindeer. When we're finished, so are the nice people who shake and wrap trees, and who then tie our selection to the top of my car.
Who would not want this experience every December? In fact, I think I just talked myself into it.
Or not.
Oy, the needles!
Anyway, last night I hung a ball of artificial mistletoe over the kitchen entry from the back hall. My hope is that it adds some color to our otherwise colorless kitchen and draws attention to the fact that we have extra-tall cabinets to match our 9' ceiling.
Hanging the mistletoe had nothing whatsoever to do with the fact that I love kissing my husband under the mistletoe every bit as much as sipping cider while watching THE BEST SANTA IN THE WHOLE WORLD take my children on his knees and treat them like his bestest friends for life.
Nothing whatsoever.
So when George noticed the mistletoe after dinner and called me over to it, I dashed into his arms. I was expecting a chaste kiss in front of the kids, but no, my romantic hubby wanted a real kiss and came at me with clear expectation of that.
I squealed "ewwwww!" and turned away.
Our firstborn fell apart laughing. "You got owned," he told his father through his guffaws. I began giggling uncontrollably because my ewwww was completely misinterpreted, and that was just so gosh darn funny.
Poor George. You see, I had just eaten a Pepperidge Farm Orange Milano cookie. Bits of it were still floating around in my mouth, and all I could think was what an icky surprise awaited my dear husband when he French kissed me at that particular moment.
See. Ewwwwww!!!
I'm still chortling this morning because it brought back memories of another episode of uncontrollable laughter. Back in our Boise days, before Nick was born and when my boobs were still perky and my waist was still tiny and my butt was still firm and my hair was still dark brown, George and I went for our regular walk around the ball fields in our neighborhood. We were discussing men and women and infidelity, and I saw the perfect opportunity to fish for a compliment.
I said, "Well, I can't imagine any man other than you wanting me."
He replied, "Susan, men really aren't that picky."
Thud.
After a brief, Arctic silence, he realized what he had said and started back-pedalling. "That's NOT what I meant! I'm sorry!" etcetera. While my first instinct was to milk the moment for what it was worth, I ended up dissolving into helpless giggles.
And that's why we've been married 25 years: because we can stop laughing.
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Sunday, November 27, 2011
Gratitude Journal #114
Today, I am grateful that Daisy's last post-op check went very well. She's recovering superbly from her knee surgery, but when Dr. David came in to examine her, she wriggled enthusiastically, whined, and tried to burrow into his crotch. He looked at me and said, "Oh, yeah, now I remember. She's 'special.'" His wife bred Daisy, so it's all her fault.
Today, I am grateful for a full and exciting November:
Jack had his 3rd Grade Music Performance, which included audience-participation line dancing.
Nick celebrated his birthday, with dinner at P.F. Chang's, Lego castle-building with his dad, and a day at the Columbus Zoo.
My 45th birthday came and went. I don't like odd numbers, but this one wasn't so bad, even if there was entirely too much cleaning going on. I am super grateful for friends and family who sent me cards and emails and phone messages and packages for my birthday. And I am grateful to my husband for grilling me the best ribeye steak I've eaten in years. YEARS, people.
Today, I am grateful that the house is fully ready to show. Now, we just need to keep it clean.
Today, I am grateful for the Thanksgiving break and for today's return to what passes for routine in our lives.
What are you grateful for today?
 |
| Our "Special" Furry Girl Looking Slightly Demonic |
Today, I am grateful for a full and exciting November:
Jack had his 3rd Grade Music Performance, which included audience-participation line dancing.
 |
| Happy to Teach Us the Dance |
 |
| Big Bro, Not So Happy |
Nick celebrated his birthday, with dinner at P.F. Chang's, Lego castle-building with his dad, and a day at the Columbus Zoo.
 |
| P.F. Chang's |
 |
| Lego Castle Building |
My 45th birthday came and went. I don't like odd numbers, but this one wasn't so bad, even if there was entirely too much cleaning going on. I am super grateful for friends and family who sent me cards and emails and phone messages and packages for my birthday. And I am grateful to my husband for grilling me the best ribeye steak I've eaten in years. YEARS, people.
 |
| Picture by Jack |
Today, I am grateful that the house is fully ready to show. Now, we just need to keep it clean.
Today, I am grateful for the Thanksgiving break and for today's return to what passes for routine in our lives.
What are you grateful for today?
Thinking about Decor
To decorate or not to decorate? That is the question. My house is staged and ready to show. Everything is as perfect as I can make it...excessively clean and orderly. What buyer wouldn't jump at the chance to live here?
Problem is, the staged house is exceedingly difficult to live in and maintain. Exhausting, really. And now that I've got it where I want it, I question the rightness of holiday decorations.
Wait, wait!!!!
I think there's a pin on Pinterest to cover this very issue!!!!!!!!
Sadly, I pinned this because it's an ideal I can never hope to attain. Telling me not to think too much is like telling Daisy not to eat dish towels. Not. Gonna. Happen.
I didn't ask the staging folks about Christmas decorations, and I am scared of messing up their good work in cluttering the place with Christmas paraphernalia.
This situation feels oddly familiar. When we were selling our house in Rapid City, I used a very light touch with Christmas decor. That's when I bought my little 6.5' slim fake tree. Keeping up with needles from a real tree seemed deeply impractical under the circumstances, and our living/dining room already looked small, with low ceilings. That artificial tree was beautiful, though.
Unfortunately, our current house has really high ceilings (9' in the library and dining room, 18' in the family room). If I understand rightly what the staging folks said, a 6.5' tree will look silly. But no way in hades am I cleaning up after a real tree, nor will I spend hundreds of dollars on a bigger artificial tree.
Add to this the fact that unpacking Christmas decorations is a messy business, and time-consuming. As a result, I was feeling very Scrooge-ish when it comes to holiday decorating. Bah, humbug.
My thoughts, however, can't stay off the subject decorating the new house. What will I do with window treatments? How will we decorate the bathrooms? What sort of rugs do we need for the living and dining areas? Where will my great-grandparents' antique bedroom set go...Nick's room or the craft room? What art will I put on the walls?
The new house is a blank slate of possibilities. I can't wait!!
Since I simply must wait until someone buys this house, it's time to get to work decorating for Christmas, no matter how Scrooge-ish I feel about it. Here's my thinking on the subject which all stems from the belief summed up in another pin from Pinterest.
1. This time of year, people will expect Christmas decor. I don't want potential buyers thinking we're a house full of Scrooges.
2. Several things the staging company said seem to apply to Christmas decor as well. First, put interesting stuff in sight-lines to draw people into rooms. Second, highlight the main features of rooms...the mantel in the family room, the island in the kitchen, the bay window in the breakfast room, the reading nook in the master bath. Third, use color to draw the eye. Fourth, don't use accessories that are smaller than basketballs.
3. We can't put a fence around our tree like last year to protect it from Daisy, the Goat-in-Retriever-Fur. A fence would not only look stupid but would draw attention to the fact that we have a dog...not a great selling point. What to do about this problem? Hmmmm. Need to think about this some more but feel certain a gallon of bitter apply may solve this dilemma nicely.
4. This is my favorite time of year because it marks the celebration of the greatest gift ever given. The commercialism and excess rampant at this time of year detracts from the joy for me, but lights, evergreens, ornaments, ribbon, and nativity sets definitely enhance the joy. Since I want and need the joy, some sort of decorating is about to happen.
No matter what the staging company says.
Problem is, the staged house is exceedingly difficult to live in and maintain. Exhausting, really. And now that I've got it where I want it, I question the rightness of holiday decorations.
Wait, wait!!!!
I think there's a pin on Pinterest to cover this very issue!!!!!!!!
Sadly, I pinned this because it's an ideal I can never hope to attain. Telling me not to think too much is like telling Daisy not to eat dish towels. Not. Gonna. Happen.
I didn't ask the staging folks about Christmas decorations, and I am scared of messing up their good work in cluttering the place with Christmas paraphernalia.
This situation feels oddly familiar. When we were selling our house in Rapid City, I used a very light touch with Christmas decor. That's when I bought my little 6.5' slim fake tree. Keeping up with needles from a real tree seemed deeply impractical under the circumstances, and our living/dining room already looked small, with low ceilings. That artificial tree was beautiful, though.
Unfortunately, our current house has really high ceilings (9' in the library and dining room, 18' in the family room). If I understand rightly what the staging folks said, a 6.5' tree will look silly. But no way in hades am I cleaning up after a real tree, nor will I spend hundreds of dollars on a bigger artificial tree.
Add to this the fact that unpacking Christmas decorations is a messy business, and time-consuming. As a result, I was feeling very Scrooge-ish when it comes to holiday decorating. Bah, humbug.
My thoughts, however, can't stay off the subject decorating the new house. What will I do with window treatments? How will we decorate the bathrooms? What sort of rugs do we need for the living and dining areas? Where will my great-grandparents' antique bedroom set go...Nick's room or the craft room? What art will I put on the walls?
The new house is a blank slate of possibilities. I can't wait!!
Since I simply must wait until someone buys this house, it's time to get to work decorating for Christmas, no matter how Scrooge-ish I feel about it. Here's my thinking on the subject which all stems from the belief summed up in another pin from Pinterest.
1. This time of year, people will expect Christmas decor. I don't want potential buyers thinking we're a house full of Scrooges.
2. Several things the staging company said seem to apply to Christmas decor as well. First, put interesting stuff in sight-lines to draw people into rooms. Second, highlight the main features of rooms...the mantel in the family room, the island in the kitchen, the bay window in the breakfast room, the reading nook in the master bath. Third, use color to draw the eye. Fourth, don't use accessories that are smaller than basketballs.
3. We can't put a fence around our tree like last year to protect it from Daisy, the Goat-in-Retriever-Fur. A fence would not only look stupid but would draw attention to the fact that we have a dog...not a great selling point. What to do about this problem? Hmmmm. Need to think about this some more but feel certain a gallon of bitter apply may solve this dilemma nicely.
4. This is my favorite time of year because it marks the celebration of the greatest gift ever given. The commercialism and excess rampant at this time of year detracts from the joy for me, but lights, evergreens, ornaments, ribbon, and nativity sets definitely enhance the joy. Since I want and need the joy, some sort of decorating is about to happen.
No matter what the staging company says.
Friday, November 25, 2011
Things I Do Not Understand
Why bad things always come in threes. George had his front bumper damaged by a flying tire tread on the interstate. My car required hundreds of dollars of repairs. WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT????
How children keep coming up with funny stuff all the time without even trying. For instance, Nick, who is twelve, was talking about a girl whom he likes. Jack, who is nine, asked, “Is she smokin’ hot?”
Why certain things in life are so stupidly complicated. I’m thinking of filing tax forms, buying and selling homes, choosing bread at the grocery store, sorting socks, and renewing Norton Antivirus in a household with multiple computers.
Quantum mechanics and string theory.
Why chocolate makes me feel good and fat at the same time.
How a person cannot like cheese. I mean, I get not liking fennel or blood sausage or star anise. But cheese?
Why on Halloween we hand out two giant bowls of candy and my children bring home two giant bowls of candy. At what point does this make sense?
Horror movies. And zombies.
Why every issue of National Geographic doesn’t contain an article on the Middle Ages. This month’s article on the Anglo Saxon treasure hoard found in a farmer’s field is wonderful and made me want to read Beowulf again.
Why I stay up extra late when George is out of town even though I KNOW I will deeply regret it the next morning at 6:00 AM when I have to wake up my son to get him on the bus.
Why my dog eats twist ties. And rocks.
Why any human being would possibly find a pair of bright red fake testicles to be an appropriate thing to hang from a truck’s trailer hitch. I saw a pair on a truck in the Walmart parking lot, and honestly, why?
How I can watch a movie about Anne Boleyn and be horrified when she gets decapitated at the end. Duh.
What, if anything, is going on in my dog’s head.
How my children can completely ignore me until I get on the phone or need to get something done, and once they have completely sabotaged my activity, they suddenly no longer need or want me at all.
Fart jokes.
Why my dog ate a bar of Dove soap and then spent the next day (Thanksgiving, ironically enough) barfing up pleasant-smelling barf.
Casual sex. (This one will get me some interesting hits on Google searches!)
What sorts of things do you not understand?
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Weekly Giggle: Bulbs and Balls
First, a personal update about bulbs.
The for-sale sign went up yesterday. George finds this deeply weird, which strikes me as weird seeing that the whole move-to-a-new-house idea was his. But that sign signals for me a slow-down in the break-neck cleaning pace. I'm taking a few hours today to make something in my craft room.
Because I can.
Yesterday was my birthday. To celebrate, I attempted to change a blown bulb on our 19-foot ceiling with the 11-foot extendable bulb changer I purchased at Lowe's for the occasion. I climbed our step ladder, seated the attachment around the floodlight bulb, and started turning. To my horror, the entire light fixture came out of the ceiling.
"But it's my BIRTHDAY!!!" I wailed. "Things like this are NOT SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN!!!!!!"
But they always do. To me.
Of course I couldn't detatch the bulb changer from the light without getting my own two little hands up to the ceiling, so I propped the bulb changer on a convenient window ledge, climbed down the step ladder, and dragged in the 18-foot extension ladder from the garage.
I believe we call this "bringing out the big guns."
I climbed the ladder very carefully and prayerfully ("Please, God, don't let me die on my birthday") and removed the bulb changer from the bulb. I dropped the whole dang thing to the floor, hoping it would break and I could revel in its demise, but sadly, it didn't so I'm going to try to return it to Lowe's today.
Then, I removed the dead bulb, carried it carefully and prayerfully down the ladder, got a new bulb, went back up the ladder, installed the working bulb, and seated the fixture back into the ceiling. I came carefully and prayerfully ("Thank you, God, for not letting me plunge to my death off this stupid ladder") down the ladder.
I held my breath as I turned on the light, but it worked. It actually worked.
And now I feel like a hero. The Hero of the Bulbs.
Second, a link to a story about balls.
I've frequently linked to Lowering the Bar on the Weekly Giggle because, well, it's an hysterically funny blog. The most recent post is no exception. Enjoy.
The for-sale sign went up yesterday. George finds this deeply weird, which strikes me as weird seeing that the whole move-to-a-new-house idea was his. But that sign signals for me a slow-down in the break-neck cleaning pace. I'm taking a few hours today to make something in my craft room.
Because I can.
Yesterday was my birthday. To celebrate, I attempted to change a blown bulb on our 19-foot ceiling with the 11-foot extendable bulb changer I purchased at Lowe's for the occasion. I climbed our step ladder, seated the attachment around the floodlight bulb, and started turning. To my horror, the entire light fixture came out of the ceiling.
"But it's my BIRTHDAY!!!" I wailed. "Things like this are NOT SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN!!!!!!"
But they always do. To me.
Of course I couldn't detatch the bulb changer from the light without getting my own two little hands up to the ceiling, so I propped the bulb changer on a convenient window ledge, climbed down the step ladder, and dragged in the 18-foot extension ladder from the garage.
I believe we call this "bringing out the big guns."
I climbed the ladder very carefully and prayerfully ("Please, God, don't let me die on my birthday") and removed the bulb changer from the bulb. I dropped the whole dang thing to the floor, hoping it would break and I could revel in its demise, but sadly, it didn't so I'm going to try to return it to Lowe's today.
Then, I removed the dead bulb, carried it carefully and prayerfully down the ladder, got a new bulb, went back up the ladder, installed the working bulb, and seated the fixture back into the ceiling. I came carefully and prayerfully ("Thank you, God, for not letting me plunge to my death off this stupid ladder") down the ladder.
I held my breath as I turned on the light, but it worked. It actually worked.
And now I feel like a hero. The Hero of the Bulbs.
Second, a link to a story about balls.
I've frequently linked to Lowering the Bar on the Weekly Giggle because, well, it's an hysterically funny blog. The most recent post is no exception. Enjoy.
Monday, November 21, 2011
Stephen Ministry Information
I've had several requests for more information about Stephen Ministry, so here are some main points.
1. Stephen Ministry is a world-wide, confidential caring ministry based in St. Louis, MO. It is inter-denominational. Their website is HERE.
2. It offers extensive, extremely high-quality training to those who want to provide Christ-centered care for people who are hurting. Stephen Ministers receive 50 hours of training from Stephen Leaders within their congregation who have gone through intensive training themselves. Once commissioned, Stephen Ministers have ongoing training throughout their service in the form of twice-monthly continuing-education meetings. There is no online training, though online support is available to those who are already trained and commissioned.
Stephen Ministers are not counsellors, nor do they offer advice. They are trained to listen and support people during times of pain. When that pain becomes excessive and professional counseling or medical care is required, Stephen Ministers can only serve a person with the permission of a doctor, psychiatrist, or other professional counsellor who is caring for them. Stephen Ministry training covers ways to help those who are having trouble bearing the "ordinary" suffering of life, and we are not trained to serve those suffering addiction, those in prison, or those suffering serious mental illness.
3. Stephen Ministry is NOT a preaching ministry, nor do Stephen Ministers promote particular points of doctrine. Stephen Ministers do NOT bang people over the head with the Bible. Care receivers need not be Christians to receive Stephen Ministry care, and it is the care receivers who establish what level of discussion--if any--about the Bible and God and faith takes place in the caring relationship. Stephen Ministers, however, spend a great deal of time in private prayer and Bible study as they care for others. The care receiver may not feel a connection to Christ, but the Stephen Minister can't imagine caring without that strong faith that Christ is the healer.
4. Stephen Ministers are not trained and then cut loose to work on their own. Peer supervision gives them the support they need to care for others whose pain may at times feel overwhelming. During peer supervision, which takes place twice a month at the same meetings as continuing education, Stephen Ministers share non-identifying details of their care receivers' situations and ask for advice and help on how to provide the best care possible. If the peer supervision group sees areas of concern (say, the Stephen Minister is over-identifying with the care receiver), they will offer guidance and support to keep the Stephen Minister on track. Peer supervision also helps Stephen Ministers make referrals to professional services (social services, professional counselling, medical care, etc.) when needed.
5. Stephen Ministry is confidential, and this sometimes unfortunately makes Stephen Ministry feel like a secret society within congregations. Stephen Ministers do not discuss their care receivers outside of peer supervision, and even in peer supervision, names are not used and identifying details are not shared.
Care receivers, however, are free to discuss their Stephen Ministers as they wish. Some will introduce their Stephen Ministers to their friends; some will avoid their Stephen Ministers in public because their pain is deeply personal and they need that care to remain confidential. In some cases, care receivers share things with Stephen Ministers that they have never shared with anyone else. To do this, they need to trust their Stephen Ministers completely.
6. Going through Stephen Ministry training will change your life. It will help you help others who are in pain, and empower you with the confidence to lean on God as you touch others you encounter in daily life who are suffering unbearable pain. I recently had to call a friend whose adult daughter died in a horrible car accident. For the first time in making such a call, I felt God's guidance and no fear or anxiety that I would say the "wrong" thing. I felt only sorrow and compassion for this wonderful woman going through this horrible loss.
Stephen Ministry training got me to this point by giving me the tools to speak the truth in love, to listen with prayer and compassion, and to take my cues from the person suffering. When we are no longer self-conscious and worried about what to say or do (which throws our attention to ourselves and not others), we can truly listen and care for others. Christ is in charge, and we're just here to help Him show His love for His children, because as He told the disciples at the Last Supper, "I give unto you a new commandment, to love one another as I have loved you."
There are many ways to love as Jesus did. Stephen Ministry is just one calling among many. If you feel that call, I encourage you to answer it. If you need a Stephen Minister, please call your local churches to locate a Ministry in your area.
I'll be happy to answer questions about Stephen Ministry in the comments.
1. Stephen Ministry is a world-wide, confidential caring ministry based in St. Louis, MO. It is inter-denominational. Their website is HERE.
2. It offers extensive, extremely high-quality training to those who want to provide Christ-centered care for people who are hurting. Stephen Ministers receive 50 hours of training from Stephen Leaders within their congregation who have gone through intensive training themselves. Once commissioned, Stephen Ministers have ongoing training throughout their service in the form of twice-monthly continuing-education meetings. There is no online training, though online support is available to those who are already trained and commissioned.
Stephen Ministers are not counsellors, nor do they offer advice. They are trained to listen and support people during times of pain. When that pain becomes excessive and professional counseling or medical care is required, Stephen Ministers can only serve a person with the permission of a doctor, psychiatrist, or other professional counsellor who is caring for them. Stephen Ministry training covers ways to help those who are having trouble bearing the "ordinary" suffering of life, and we are not trained to serve those suffering addiction, those in prison, or those suffering serious mental illness.
3. Stephen Ministry is NOT a preaching ministry, nor do Stephen Ministers promote particular points of doctrine. Stephen Ministers do NOT bang people over the head with the Bible. Care receivers need not be Christians to receive Stephen Ministry care, and it is the care receivers who establish what level of discussion--if any--about the Bible and God and faith takes place in the caring relationship. Stephen Ministers, however, spend a great deal of time in private prayer and Bible study as they care for others. The care receiver may not feel a connection to Christ, but the Stephen Minister can't imagine caring without that strong faith that Christ is the healer.
4. Stephen Ministers are not trained and then cut loose to work on their own. Peer supervision gives them the support they need to care for others whose pain may at times feel overwhelming. During peer supervision, which takes place twice a month at the same meetings as continuing education, Stephen Ministers share non-identifying details of their care receivers' situations and ask for advice and help on how to provide the best care possible. If the peer supervision group sees areas of concern (say, the Stephen Minister is over-identifying with the care receiver), they will offer guidance and support to keep the Stephen Minister on track. Peer supervision also helps Stephen Ministers make referrals to professional services (social services, professional counselling, medical care, etc.) when needed.
5. Stephen Ministry is confidential, and this sometimes unfortunately makes Stephen Ministry feel like a secret society within congregations. Stephen Ministers do not discuss their care receivers outside of peer supervision, and even in peer supervision, names are not used and identifying details are not shared.
Care receivers, however, are free to discuss their Stephen Ministers as they wish. Some will introduce their Stephen Ministers to their friends; some will avoid their Stephen Ministers in public because their pain is deeply personal and they need that care to remain confidential. In some cases, care receivers share things with Stephen Ministers that they have never shared with anyone else. To do this, they need to trust their Stephen Ministers completely.
6. Going through Stephen Ministry training will change your life. It will help you help others who are in pain, and empower you with the confidence to lean on God as you touch others you encounter in daily life who are suffering unbearable pain. I recently had to call a friend whose adult daughter died in a horrible car accident. For the first time in making such a call, I felt God's guidance and no fear or anxiety that I would say the "wrong" thing. I felt only sorrow and compassion for this wonderful woman going through this horrible loss.
Stephen Ministry training got me to this point by giving me the tools to speak the truth in love, to listen with prayer and compassion, and to take my cues from the person suffering. When we are no longer self-conscious and worried about what to say or do (which throws our attention to ourselves and not others), we can truly listen and care for others. Christ is in charge, and we're just here to help Him show His love for His children, because as He told the disciples at the Last Supper, "I give unto you a new commandment, to love one another as I have loved you."
There are many ways to love as Jesus did. Stephen Ministry is just one calling among many. If you feel that call, I encourage you to answer it. If you need a Stephen Minister, please call your local churches to locate a Ministry in your area.
I'll be happy to answer questions about Stephen Ministry in the comments.
Monday, November 14, 2011
Gratitude Journal #113
Today, I am grateful for the progress we made this weekend toward getting our house on the market.
Today, I am grateful for the United States Postal Service.
Today, I am grateful for the marketing design company that's coming tomorrow to offer up suggestions for furniture placement and simple improvements to (hopefully) make our house more appealing to buyers.
Today, I am grateful that Jack's ritalin is working so very well with no side effects.
What are you grateful for today?
Today, I am grateful for the United States Postal Service.
Today, I am grateful for the marketing design company that's coming tomorrow to offer up suggestions for furniture placement and simple improvements to (hopefully) make our house more appealing to buyers.
Today, I am grateful that Jack's ritalin is working so very well with no side effects.
What are you grateful for today?
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